Where you sit makes a Difference

How was your weekend?  Mine was wonderful!  I spent Friday being a complete goofball at game night with some friends and I made Snickerdoodles!  YUMMMMM.  I love to cook for people {weird, I know}.  I spent Saturday being productive {somewhat} by cleaning my room, lots of washing going on and I did yoga.  Friday was topped with a night of friends laughing and dancing!  Sunday I spent the day at church with Advance.  Advance is our awesome youth group and I had lunch with my fellow Advance volunteers!  They are amazingly wonderful!  They give so much of their time and energy to this ministry making a huge impact in the lives of students.  I {heart} Advance.  We had our monthly training huddle and lunch.  We had worship {Ahhh-mazing} and the sermon was awesome, then we went outside and had time for fellowship with the students.  I love my girls!  I have the bestest group ever!

In our huddle training on Sunday I was given a print out from the book Intimate Moments With A Savior by Ken Gire.  I must say... Lovvvve it!  At least the print out anyways.  The chapter we looked at was about Mary and Martha, and it was taken from Luke 10:38-42.  It was about the focus of our heart, being intimate with God and having the relationship He longs for with us.  Martha is hard at work in the kitchen preparing the meal for Jesus.  Jesus comes in from a long journey and Mary washes his feet.  Then she just sits at his feet while he tells of the disciples and the long journeys.  Martha is very busy, working hard and getting frustrated with Mary and Jesus.  Her words were "Lord, don't you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself?  Tell her to help me!"  She accuses Mary of being lazy and she basically says that Jesus has no concern.  Jesus' response is kind, he says  "Martha, Martha, you are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed.  Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."  What can not be taken away from her?  The time spent with him, the fellowship, the words of wisdom, the impact on her life of knowing who He is and how much he loves her.  Intimacy.  

Even as a woman, intimacy is hard for me.  I guess I've always thought women don't struggle with that as much as men do, so I feel like an odd ball. To really be vulnerable with someone and share everything, to talk for hours, pray for one another, to know details about each others life and share that life together - I want that so much but it's hard for me.  I need to be more vulnerable and open... how else will I ever be married?  Intimacy is kind of scary. At least I recognize that and can work through it.  I want to be more open and willing, I want to be a better listener.  Just learning to sit at his feet and listen to every word, letting it sink in and grip my heart.  I want to linger in prayer with him without thinking about what's next on my agenda.  I want my heart to change - to be devoted to him and love him more. 

I don't want to be like Martha but I know I am.  {Eeeee... admiting this on a blog}  I struggle with trying to get everything done that needs to be done.  I pack too many things into one day and run around like a crazy person.  I can be lazy on the weekends and sleep in on Saturdays... and I've watched myself go the whole day without really spending time with my Lord!  Why?  Why?  My focus is so off!  I hate this!  I'm frustrated with myself.  This scripture is convicting.  A little hard to swallow.  I know the story of Mary and Martha but it's been a while since I read it.  I admire Mary's tender heart and how she took time to sit with Jesus.  She just loved him and wanted to know him more.

"And what did Mary do?  All she did was sit.  It was where she sat that made the difference."


Prayer {from book} that I love

Dear Savior at whose feet I now sit,
When you knock on the door to my heart, what is it you are looking for?  What is it you want?  Is it not to come in to dine with me and I with you?   Is it not for fellowship? 
And yet, so often, where do you find me?  At your feet?  No.  In the kitchen.  How many times have I become distracted and left you there.... sitting... waiting.... longing? 
What is so important about my kitchen full of preparations that draws me away from you?  How can they seem so trivial now and yet so urgent when I'm caught up in them? 
Forgive me for being so much distracted by my preparations and so little attracted by your presence.  for being so diligent in my service and so negligent in my devotion.  For being so quick to my feet and so slow to yours. 
Help me understand that it is an intimate moment you seek from me, not an elaborate meal. 
Guard my heart this day from the many distractions that vie for my attention.  And help me to fix my eyes on you.  Not on my rank in the kingdom, as did the disciples.  Not on the finer points of theology, as did the scribes.  Not on the sins of others, as did the Pharisees.  Not on a place of worship, as did the woman at the well.  Not on the budget, as did Judas.  But on you. 
Bring me out of the kitchen, Lord.  Bid me come to your feet. And there may I thrill to sit and adore thee....