It's not about me

You can be sure that I have heard the groans of the people of Israel, who are now slaves to the Egyptians. And I am well aware of my covenant with them.

“Therefore, say to the people of Israel: ‘I am the Lord. I will free you from your oppression and will rescue you from your slavery in Egypt. I will redeem you with a powerful arm and great acts of judgment. I will claim you as my own people, and I will be your God. Then you will know that I am the Lord your God who has freed you from your oppression in Egypt. I will bring you into the land I swore to give to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. I will give it to you as your very own possession. I am the Lord!’”

So Moses told the people of Israel what the Lord had said, but they refused to listen anymore. They had become too discouraged by the brutality of their slavery. Exodus 6:5 – 9

I have had my heart set on this scripture for a while, pondering it, and wrestling with why it seems significant to me. Why is God showing me this? There's so much depth to this scripture and i can only go into a portion of it now. One thing I see, one thing i finally get is...  I am an Israelite. 

The things of this world can enslave us and hold us down. I can be the negative, non-believing Israelite. I am His child. My Father God tells me His promises, He reassures me of His love, He tenderly speaks to my heart confirming His promises again and again, yet I walk in disbelief.

As it happened with the Israelites, sometimes the brutality of life can wear us down so much that we can’t see the next step. And we choose to become so distraught, we lose our hope.  

I have often thought that HOPE was about holding on tightly. Holding on with everything in me! Holding on with all my strength! It’s not. Hope is about letting go and letting the ONE who is perfect work it out and I just get to be me.

So, what is it that I’ve been missing? How does that scripture relate?  

Well, to put it quite frankly – it’s not about me.

Maybe you are like me in some ways. I’ve focused hard on ministry, work, my needs, my desires, my dreams, my feelings… And I forget who it is that is behind it all and what really matters. It’s not about me. It’s about HIM.

Those dreams, those desires, those passions are gifts from Him. I just need to trust.

In this scripture, God is telling Moses {Paraphrased}, ‘I’ve heard the cries of My people. They belong to Me. I see their struggle. I see their tears. I hear their prayers. They are not forgotten. They are not ignored. It’s just been a matter of time and the time has come. I will do a mighty work and they will know I am the Lord their God.’

More times than I’d like to admit, I’ve felt completely ignored by God. I have felt forgotten. I’ve wondered if He sees me at all. In the scriptures above, God reminds Moses of who He is. He repeatedly says,

‘I am the Lord.

I will free you…

I will redeem you…

I will rescue you…

I will claim you as My own…

I will.

Did you see that? I will… I will… It’s not about you. It’s not about me.

It’s about HIM.

So maybe we stop holding on to what we think our life is supposed to look like and let go. Have hope in the ONE who knows us inside-out, every detail of our being, every hair on our head, every wrinkle on our skin. Trust in the ONE whose ways are perfect.

He wants to do something so great and so wonderful that we can’t mistake that it is only by HIS hand.

Dwell on His truth. Take Him at His word. Read His truth continually so that His words become so engrained in your mind that you don’t give the enemy a foothold. 

For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

Hebrews 4:12

The oppression of the enemy fights us, wearing us down. I have to remind myself of God's promises and rest in Him. I choose to focus on His truth and speak boldly against the fear of the enemy. I choose LOVE. I choose to let go and HOPE. I have a perfect, holy Creator God who loves me beyond my comprehension. And He works things out for the good of those that truly love Him. {Romans 8} I believe He will do things in such a way that there is no other explanation for His work, so that HE alone gets the glory.

He only asks me to seek Him first. Seek the kingdom of God first. And so, I let go.

It’s not about me.

Some things in life may seem impossible. Things may seem to never end. Maybe you feel like there is no light at the end of the tunnel.

There is. It is Him.

There’s so much more depth to this scripture and that will come later. I will let this soak in for now.  

Love, Valentines Day, and a Book

I have a favorite book that isn't talked about very much, at least not amongst people I know.  The book that I'm loving right now is When God Pursues A Woman's Heart.  I'm re-reading it, and only in the beginning of it but already being reminded why I loved it so much the first time I read it. 

This time of year we have a made-up holiday called Valentine's Day.  It's where you take your significant other to some fancy restaurant and buy them a fancy dinner and an over-priced bouquet of roses to impress them.

The truth is a wonderful man of God should come along and take me to a nice restaurant and then to Coldstone Creamery {don't forget the Lactaid}.  Or to Ritas for ice-Italian icecream!  YUM!  :o)  Or something even more wonderfully unique like a random road trip somewhere beautiful, maybe have some crazy fun with a zip-line, or maybe ski together {I need practice first}!  There's lots of unique fun things to do on Valentines Day... maybe someone will read this and take me?  Oh I do love to dream!  I don't have a date and I'm totally making this stuff up just being funny... but it does seem like a great plan, doesn't it?!  :o)  It would be lovely to have the companionship of someone, to spend time just enjoying one another over a nice dinner.

So, the book I'm reading talks about LOVE and being loved by our Creator.  This book makes me think about how God delights so much in His creation - His children and how He loves us more than we can comprehend.... and how He delights so much in us - beautiful women.  There's so much joy He gets knowing us, seeing our hearts, our sensitivity, our laughter, and all the characteristics that make us women.  As I read, I think about how the relationship between man and woman is truly beautiful and unique, and God takes great joy in that too!  But I also think about the relationship between woman and her Creator.  I think about how God sees me as a woman, how different His delight is for me, than for anyone else.  He uniquely created me and you, and we bring Him joy. 

I think about the many times when I don't seek Him, when I forget to pray, when I'm lazy and don't feel like talking with Him, when I am tempted to walk away from my faith in Him {yes this happens} and I realize how heartbroken He is for me in those moments and how His compassion reaches out.  God understands the tears, He sees my pain and weeps with me.  I realize how this relationship I have with God is not something to take lightly, but He is a jealous God who will not let go.  This is a relationship He fights for, winning my heart again and again. 

In the beginning of the book, it talks a lot about the Garden of Eden and how Eve walked with God... then the fall to sin came and their relationship changed drastically.  It became harder to commune with Him because of sin.  Not only do we still feel that heartbreak and we have that longing in us to want to be with Him.... but imagine how He feels.  I forget about that.  He is a jealous God.  Loving us unconditionally, faithfully, and without waver.  Imagine how He felt to not have that intimate communion with Eve anymore.  I think it broke His heart, more than it did Eve. 

It's a great book, I highly recommend it for any woman.  If you don't have a date for Valentine's Day, go to a bookstore or alibris.com and get this book.  :o) 

It feels good to at least began to understand the love and desire God truly has for me.  Have a great Valentine's Day, with or without a date!